A New Outlook

When people give blogging awards, sometimes I like to go and check out the blogs of the recipients. The other day, Amy W. gave out an award and I had some extra time so I went and looked at some of them. My life hasn’t been the same since that day.

I clicked on Life with Hannah and Lily. I read through her archives about the loss of her daughter Hannah, and absolutely lost it. And I was at work. Crying my eyes out. I just keep thinking about what would happen if I lost my sweet little girl (or my son for that matter, but it’s been easier to relate to this woman when I think about it being my daughter).

That night I went home with a determination that I would spend the entire night with my kids. That I wouldn’t get so frustrated over the littlest things. That I would give them even more hugs and kisses throughout the night. And tell them “I love you” so many times.

The next day at work I read some more, and definitely cried some more. Again I went home that night with a purpose of just being there for my kids. Last night I realized that I wanted to change my whole outlook towards everyone. Even people that when I hear their name I normally cringe – I was softening towards.

Throughout the posts, she states that she gets a lot of comfort knowing that people’s lives are being changed because of what happened to her daughter. I am definitely one of those people. I think it’s awesome for her to say that, because I don’t think I could be that big. I think I would be selfish, and not care about anyone else’s lives...but she also says that you never know how you’ll act or feel until it happens, which I’m sure is true.

I hope this feeling inside of me lasts…I hope that I can remember that I never know how long I get to keep the people in my life, and to make the most of each moment. I need to make sure that when I’m upset with my kids or “yelling” at them, it’s because I’m teaching them to be better people and how to be disciplined, and that I’m not just being impatient or selfish.

It’s weird, I’ve read a bunch of blogs of women that have lost babies or other loved ones, and I’ve always been very sad. But this one is different…I can’t explain the feeling I have inside every time I think of that sweet princess…a little girl I never met has truly changed me.

Books Galore!

Last night my neighbor told me that the elementary school was having a book fair and wanted to know if I wanted to walk over there with her (I really, really love that the elementary school is IN our neighborhood and across the street!). So I took my daughter and we headed over there. They had all types of books, from board books to adult books, so my daughter was able to find a couple that she wanted. She got a Fairytopia book, a “new” Holly Hobby book (wow, she really has become a lot cooler than she was when I was little!) and we got my son a Curious George book. My daughter saw one of the bigger girls carrying a High School Musical 2 book and she went nuts. I knew it was a chapter book and way too old for her, but I told her we could get it and I could read her a chapter each night before bed.

So here’s a picture of the kids reading their new books. My daughter had pulled out the bed railing and made a little area for them to read in my son’s room and included a number of each of their dollies.

And then before she went to sleep we read a chapter from her HSM book. I’m not sure what she thought of it…thankfully she has already seen the movies, so she knows what they look like, but the vocabulary was pretty advanced for her. But she listened to the whole thing!

Christmas Craziness Already!!!

It appears that the Christmas craziness has started at our house. I checked the mailbox last night and found a catalog for My Twinn Dolls. These are dolls that you get to look just like you and then you can buy outfits for your daughter and her “twin” to match. And they are really cute and have really cute accessories. I knew the second my daughter saw these she would go nuts. The problem is that they are $130. For a doll!!!! The other problem is that they are huge, and will probably come up to my daughter’s chest!

I was right about her going crazy….she kept squealing and saying “mom, can I have this???” I told her that the doll was too big and maybe when she was bigger. That didn’t stop her from flipping through the whole magazine “oooing” and “awwwing” through each page. She then got to the back where she saw the My Twinn Babies and informed me that those were not too big. I agreed with her (only because they are only $29) and told her that she could ask Santa for one. She was so excited. She then went through and made a list of all the baby stuff she was going to ask Santa for.

Hubby isn’t worried…he thinks she’ll forget about this in a couple days. I had to remind him that this was about the time last year that my daughter had seen the Baby Alive doll in a catalog and said she wanted it. I ignored it, and then in December she reminded me that she really wanted the “doll that pooped.” The problem? It had become one of the “hot toys” and I had to become an angry mom in order to get one without paying more than the MSRP for it. I’m glad I did though, because she still loves that doll more than any of her other dollies.

So I guess I should keep my eyes out to watch for signs for this doll becoming so popular I can’t find it. And I’ll cross my fingers that she’ll forget, because really, she does not need any more dolls!

Fun Monday - Favorite Recipe!

Today’s Fun Monday is brought to us by Lisa over at The Food Snob.

Her challenge:
I want to see your favorite recipe, be it either because your grandmother wrote it, it's the easiest thing you can slap together that everyone likes, it makes you feel healthy, it's cheap, etc. You don't have to make it (although you could if you want) but let us see the index card, cookbook, printed paper from the web, and why it's a favorite in your house. If you have a lot, just pick one, I know I'll have to!

I’m so excited about this one because I LOVE to cook and try out new recipes! This challenge was also a no-brainer for me because I have a recipe that is super easy and tastes great…so I’m sure everyone will benefit from me sharing it. Did I mention how easy it is??

A very, very nice friend of mine made this dish for me right after I had my son. We loved it so much that I begged her for the recipe. I took a picture of the e-mail that she sent me with the recipe on it. I made this dish yesterday and we had some friends over that also really enjoy this dish (it’s my staple for any time I need to prepare a meal for someone). So since I had a bunch of starving people around, I didn’t get a chance to snap a picture of the finished product. But I really hope you guys try it out…it’s fabulous!


**The crackers need to be crused up when you use them...she forgot to mention that.

Now go check out all the other participants!!!

Here are some videos. Sorry they are so long...I didn't think about that when I was taking them! Enjoy if you have a couple of minutes!

Here's a video from Day Out With Thomas. Please ignore my annoying voice :) Also, we are talking about Caribou because my son loves Polar Express, and there are Caribou on the tracks in that movie, so he's always watching for them!




On Thomas The Train from Debbie on Vimeo.


Here is my daughter at gymnastics. She's the one in the pink leotard that does not have a skirt. It was great...there were only 3 kids in her make-up class last night!



Gymnastics! from Debbie on Vimeo.

I'm Sorry....Is That So Hard?

Remember when you were little and saying you were sorry for something was the biggest torture there was? I would have rather my parents have given me 10 spankings than made me apologize for something I had done. I would seriously beg for any other punishment than having to go back to the person and apologize. Unfortunately, I was still this way until a couple of years ago. Let me tell you, it made the first few years of marriage very rough for hubby and me because I was so stubborn (and I married a very stubborn person as well).

I have no idea when it happened, but God has really done some great things in my life in this area, and I have found it so much easier to apologize. Now don’t get me wrong…I don’t apologize when I don’t think I’ve done anything wrong – I’m not a fake apologizer :) But when I am wrong, it’s so much easier for me to admit it lately.

I’ve seen how much better hubby and I have gotten along the last couple years because my stubbornness has died down (that’s right, I didn’t say it has gone away :) ). It’s almost funny when you’re in an argument with someone and then you all of a sudden apologize…and they weren’t ready for that…it’s almost like you’ve thrown them a curve ball and they don’t know how to react. The only thing they really can do is forgive you and move one, because how would that look if they didn’t?

Obviously yesterday played into this when I realized how easy it was for me to apologize for the things that I had misunderstood. When I was driving home from work I remembered how if this had been just a couple years ago, there’s no way I would have apologized for anything…if I didn’t do something blatantly wrong, then there was no need for me to be sorry for anything; at least that’s what I thought.

Thankfully my kids haven’t hit the stage where they won’t say they’re sorry. If my daughter hurts my son and I tell her to apologize, she’ll go up to him and say “I’m sorry.” The same goes for my son. I know they will hit the stage, everyone does, but I just hope I can get them out of it quicker than I got out of it.

The Better Type of Mommy

Last night we took our daughter to her weekly gymnastics class. Hubby and I both love to watch her, and she’s getting so much better even in the 3 weeks she’s been going. But it is always a chore trying to entertain our son at the same time. He just doesn’t get sitting there for 40 minutes to watch sissy do gymnastics. His favorite phrase to me is “I go in there when I get bigger.” The gym actually has a child’s area that he could play in, and a swingset* outside, but like I said…hubby and I both love to watch our daughter, so we don’t want to leave the area just so our son can play.

So the weekly tradition has been when my daughter is warming up, I take my son to the vending machine and get him emmies (M&M’s). He entertains himself eating those for most of the class. Last night I felt like every mom was just staring at me…giving me a look that said “I can’t believe you’re giving such a young child M&M’s.” Even the lady next to me who had told me my son was "so cute" kept giving me the evil eye. Then my son dropped the bag of M&M’s on the floor not once, but twice – and of course I helped him pick them up and put them back in the bag to eat, ‘cause I’m a great mom like that.

So while he was having a blast eating his emmies and sharing with hubby and I, I cheered on my daughter while she had an amazing class. She would wave to me, and call for me to watch her do something she was particularly proud of, and oh yeah, I was videotaping the whole class. When she was done I got down on the floor and put my arms out and gave her a gigantic hug and told her I was so proud of her and how her cartwheel looked so good and her arms were so strong that she could hold her chin-up for so long! Then we gathered everything up and headed out the door.

I realized something. In that gym there were two types of moms (and dads): The group that doesn’t give their kids sugar and wouldn’t dream of letting their kids eat off the floor, but who also didn’t hear when their child called for them because they were busy talking, and when they did respond it was very unenthusiastic. And then there were the type that didn’t care about a little sugar or dirt, but that outwardly showed their kids how proud they were of them and how much they loved them (the ones that were cheering very loudly the whole time!). On the way home I decided that it’s better for my kids to have some sugar and other “not-so-great-stuff” and to know how much I love them, and how proud of them they are, and that they always have my attention.


*if you google “swingset” it’s actually spelled both ways equally, so I have no idea which way is correct (“swingset” or “swing set”).

Day Out With Thomas

This weekend was great! First, my parents had the kids on Friday night, so hubby and I went and had a very nice dinner. Then on Saturday, he got up and left at 5:15 AM for Virginia Tech and I slept in until 10:00!!! It was so nice to just wake up whenever I wanted to. Then I watched a cheesy Lifetime movie (I haven’t watched one of those since before my daughter was born) and just hung around. Then I went in to take a shower and get dressed and was annoyed at how messy my closet was and went into a total cleaning spree – bagged up a bunch of clothes and took them to Goodwill and everything! Now my closet is neat and organized (hubby was shocked when he got home!).

Then I got my kids back in the early afternoon and we played! My sister came down from Michigan and hung out with us too, which was really nice. We took the kids to park and then just played outside for a while. I took them in and gave them a bath before dinner since they were so dirty and they kept whining “I don’t want to go to bed” (can you tell the one constant routine we have in our house???). After their bath we headed to Old Navy to get them more winter clothes and then to dinner. It was really nice and the kids were awesome considering they didn’t have very long naps.

Then on Sunday we headed out to Day out with Thomas!!! It was nice, but a little disappointing considering the ticket prices were $16 each and I had to buy one for my 2 year-old son as well. But he loved it, and afterwards we went to this cute little ice cream parlor/restaurant for lunch. But my son was so tired he fell asleep sitting on hubby’s lap waiting for the high chair! That is so unlike him…but he was so tired!

Here are the pictures…..

Moms2moms and Thomas!

So last night was the first meeting of the year of my moms’ group and I loved it! I walked in and saw my table already set up (I’m the table leader, so it’s my job to set the table up, i.e. put the papers, pens, etc. out) so that made me happy. I met our mentor (who’s the one that set the table up) and she is absolutely wonderful! Very outgoing and throughout the night really asked us a lot of questions to get to know each of us better. I think she is going to be so great and our table really needs a great mentor.

Then I got to meet some new women that are at our table this year…I’m really, really excited about this next year! We did the typical things…announcements, devotions, ate some yummy food, and got to know the ladies at our table. The one mentor got up and gave a devotional about love and talked about how her husband had died this past April. She talked about all the things they had planned this year – their oldest granddaughter was graduating college in June and getting married in July, they had planned a trip to Alaska with friends in August because he had always said he wanted to see Alaska…there was not a dry eye in the whole room and a lot of sniffling to be heard. It was great for her to share how her family and friends showed so much love during this difficult time.

Then we did crafts – there were little bags in different colors and we picked ribbons to go around the top and appliqués to glue on. We only got to do one, but our wonderful mentor offered to do one for my son so that each of my kids would get one. I did a beautiful coral one for my daughter with a bunch of flowers glued on, and then the one for my son is denim and has a football, basketball and soccer ball glued on it. I should have taken pictures :(


As for this weekend, hubby will be down in Virginia all day tomorrow and the kids and I will be hanging out…inside! I heard the high is supposed to be 63 degrees – for me, that’s cold! Then on Sunday we’re heading out on a little trip to see Thomas!!! Day Out With Thomas is Sunday and my son is going to go nuts! I will definitely post pictures!!!

Randomness….

1.) My daughter only woke up one time last night…which was because her brother (who woke up 3 times) was crying so loudly he woke her up. I let myself sleep an extra 20 minutes this morning and got here at 8:00 instead of 7:30, and I actually feel a lot better.

2.) My parents normally watch my kids on Fridays, but tomorrow they have an important meeting tomorrow (they are both accounting professors), so my dad is picking the kids up at the sitter’s this afternoon and taking them home with him. My mom will bring them back early Saturday morning on her way to a wedding. I hate that they’ll be gone for two nights…I always miss them so much! But at least I’ll get two full night’s sleeps!!! You have no idea how much this excites me!

3.) I have my first meeting of my mom’s group of the year tonight. We got new people at our table (we had 5 last year, this year we have 10!) and a new mentor (a mom with grown kids to give us “newbies” advice and help when we need it). I’m so excited to meet some new women and to start the meetings again. People volunteer to bring in food, so we get some really good food while we’re there, and then we either have a craft or a speaker, and then just some time to hang out and talk. It’s a spin off of MOPS (we were MOPS but then since we were so big we decided we didn’t way to pay the MOPS fees when we could start our own) called moms2moms.

4.) Hubby is going down to Virginia Tech on Saturday to watch the Virginia Tech vs. OU game. He and a friend are leaving at 6:00 AM on Saturday morning and won’t get back until really late. For some reason, I’m really looking forward to having the kids by myself all day. We can do whatever we want…which is weird, because it’s not like we can’t when hubby’s around. I think I’m looking forward to it because hubby always wants to do some type of work on Saturdays (clean up around the house, yard work, etc.) and I like my weekends for relaxation. I try to do as much during the week as I can so that I can just hang out with the kids on the weekends.

I think that’s it…enjoy your Thursday!!!

Trying To Stay Awake

I am so tired. Very, very tired. There are two reasons for this:

1.) Last night as I was getting ready to go to sleep, I flipped to MSNBC which had the live coverage of 9/11 that was going on that morning. Hubby and I couldn’t stop watching it. It went past my bedtime.

2.) The main reason I’m so tired is because of my daughter. Every night, in the dead middle of the night, she wakes up and either cries from her room or comes into my room and wakes me up. She claims she is scared. Of what, she won’t tell me…she just says she’s scared. She did it twice last night. So I walk her back to her room and put her back to bed. But she has woken me out of a very, very deep sleep. And I’m the person that has the alarm clock going off 45 minutes before I actually have to wake up because I just don’t work well without slowly waking up.

If anyone has any advice on this, please feel free to pass it along. I feel like I’m doing everything right…she goes to sleep in her own bed, I always take her back to her bed, etc. And she’s truly scared…she’s crying real tears, not just whining. And her room has a very good nightlight, she has a little thing that projects princesses on the ceiling, and her door is left open.

She’s always been a problem-sleeper – as a baby we would have to hold her for her to go to sleep. We tried the cry-it-out thing with her for 3 nights and each night she cried for 3 hours straight with no sign of giving up. I’m.just.so.tired.

Thankfully our son is a much better sleeper!

In Remembrance....

My post on September 11th, 2006 can be read here…it talks about what we were doing and how we found out about what was going on.

I’m a little scared because I feel like this year it doesn’t have as big of an impact on me…like the horrible disaster is fading away. I know “time heals” but I don’t want to forget what thousands of families are going through today. I haven’t seen the World Trade Center movie yet, but I did see United 93 (was that the name of the movie?) and I was glued to all of the TV coverage and documentaries last year on this date…it was horrific to say the least and I don’t want to forget.

Maybe I’m supposed to…not all of it of course, but the really bad parts. I’m guessing that happens to everyone after major events. We remember it happened, but not all of the gruesome details, and that’s what allows us to get back on planes and go to the top floors of big buildings. Up through last year, on the anniversary, every news website and show had stories and articles remembering the day. But today, the news websites I went to had very little, if any, about September 11th.

Last year I was dying to be in front of a TV as much as I could to watch all of the newscasts and re-live the day…I felt like I owed it to the family members of all the lost. But this year I’m content at remembering the event, saying a quick prayer for the families, and going about my day.

What about you? Are the events fading away or is it the same to you as it was 6 years ago?

Is It Friday Yet????

I hate Sunday nights and Mondays. I mean I really, really hate them. Hubby and I were cleaning up the house last night after the kids went to bed and that feeling sinks in knowing that there’s a whole week of work ahead and that I’m going from two whole wonderful days with the kids to only seeing them for a couple hours each night.

My neighbor and friend was always the opposite…she lived for Monday mornings when she could push her kids through the day-care door and get to work. She had no problem admitting that the whole weekend with her kids was too much for her and that she loved Sunday nights knowing she could put them to bed and take them to someone else the next morning. It hurt my ears every time I would hear her say that, and I have never, ever understood it.

This past weekend was great…Saturday was a little tiring (another post), but the kids were great despite the conditions. And then yesterday we hung out all day, took a two-hour nap together, and then went to the park. I already miss them so much!!!

Each day this week it will get better…tonight my daughter has gymnastics again and then it’s time for Monday night football (a tradition she has had with her dad since she was a baby) which now entails orange pop, root beer, cheesy-bread and hanging out on the couch with dad (I hate football, but will watch it will just so I can hang out with them). This year my son is really looking forward to the Monday night ritual as well. Then tomorrow I’ll wake up and start the countdown to the weekend!

I got my hair done and had so much fun! My appointment started at 6:45, and there was a lady already processing when I got there, so her appointment must have been at 6:00. I didn’t end up leaving until 9:15!!! My sister-in-law and I were just talking away about everything under the sun. Luckily her next appointment wasn’t until then, so it worked out.

I went home and gathered up the kids to take them to the sitter’s and that was not fun. The cried the whole way there and then when I was trying to say “good-bye” they were crying and saying “I want to go with you.” This made me think two things: 1.) I’m glad hubby is normally the one to drop them off (they never do that to him!) and 2.) I’m glad he normally drops them off when they are still sleeping!

On a side note…when I picked the kids up yesterday I took them to the store to get me some more medicine and some stuff to put on our bug bites so we don’t itch anymore. The kids of course made me put them in one of these (the top right one is the one we had):

Now I’m sure most of you know that those things are not easy to push (there’s a lot of weird physics behind getting it to actually go where you want it to go). But luckily the aisles were big enough and the store was pretty empty.

But along comes this lady that also has one. And she decides that she needs to take up the whole aisle when she’s driving one. Seriously, I was coming at her and I thought we were going to have a head-on collision. But she’s just talking away to her kid and not caring that she’s about to run me over.

Maybe they should make you pass a driving test before you’re allowed to actually take one out into the store.

Random, Random

I’m at a loss as to what to talk about today (I think it’s because my head is pounding, my ears are plugged up and my nose won’t stop running) so here are some random bullet points…enjoy!

-I left for work today at 7:08 and got to work at 8:00. I have no idea what the heck was up with the traffic this morning…it’s only supposed to take me ½ hour…so not a good start to the day.

-I have a hair appointment at 6:45 am tomorrow morning. Yep, that’s right, 6:45 am. My original appointment was last Saturday, but since we were out of town my sister-in-law was nice enough to reschedule me, and she’s booked months in advance, so I took what I could get. It’s going to be a very early morning.

-My son has been SUPER clingy to me lately. I constantly hear “mommy holda me,” “mommy help me,” “get me out mommy,” and the best: “I ove u too mommy.” Lately he’s gotten really pouty and kind of mean to his sister and says this: “I not going to pay wiff u anymore I just going to pay wiff mommy.” I always tell him that’s mean and not to say it, and then turn my head and laugh so hard because it’s just so darn funny!

-I’m working on something at work that bores me to death. But unfortunately, it has a gigantic impact on our business. Just to emphasize the bore factor…for any accountants out there it involves reading and analyzing FASB statement 157 – Fair Value (you’re all on the edge of your seats, aren’t you?).

I think that’s it…sorry nothing exciting to talk about…maybe after I do more reading about FAS 157 I’ll have some riveting discussion ideas. Or maybe I’ll fall asleep and wake up at 5:00 when it’s time to leave :)

Rebecca over at Confessions of A Working Mom tagged me for this interesting meme:

You must list one fact that is somehow relevant to your life for each letter of your middle name. If you don’t have a middle name, use the middle name you would have liked to have had. When you are tagged you need to write your own blog-post containing your own middle name game facts. At the end of your blog-post, you need to choose one person for each letter of your middle name to tag. Don’t forget to leave them a comment telling them they’re tagged, and to read your blog.

My middle name is Christine, which was kind of difficult, but here we go!

Christian – without God I am truly nothing and He has blessed me beyond belief!
Happy – I really and truly am happy with my life!
Recipes – I LOVE to cook and am always trying new recipes out on my family
Ice cream – I love it! My favorites are Bryers Natural Vanilla and Graeter’s Cookies & Cream
Scrabooking – it’s my one true hobby and I love it! But I never have enough time for it
Technology – with a computer-geek husband we are seriously always up to date on it. If we don’t have it, we know all about it and really want it! If you came to our house you would be amazed at all the crazy stuff we have!
Internet – Without this I would be dead in the water! From keeping up with friends, to meeting new ones, to work for my job – the internet is always my first resource.
Neatness – I’m kind of a neat freak and like things picked up and clean
Everyone – I’m always trying to please everybody…not necessarily a good thing, but it’s what I do. I really wish I could stop, but no matter how much I try to tell myself "I don't care," I really do.

I know some of these are lame, but give me a break, I had 9 letters I had to use!!!

I now tag the following people:

Julie
Kellie
Rachel
Amy W
Heather J
Edie C
Tori
Jen
Beth

Have Fun!!!

The Rest of Vacation....

The rest of the vacation was nice…except it seems I caught a little cold. I thought it was just my allergies to my parents’ cats, but we came home on Sunday and I still feel like crap.

We camped out in my parents’ backyard on Friday night and had a blast! Then Saturday night we went to the football game. We were supposed to leave Sunday night, but by 1:00 on Sunday we were restless and decided to head home. The kids slept the whole way home and woke up just as we pulled into the parking lot of the place where we ate dinner. Once we got home we were able to unpack and do laundry and then head outside to play. We had a little fire with the neighbors and had a great night!

Yesterday we played around the house and then went to the house of one of our city’s police officers that hubby knows (the police department is a client of his). It was kind of strange because I didn’t know them at all, but we had a nice time anyway.

Today hubby’s parents are watching the kids…I’m a little worried how they’ll be tomorrow when they go back to the sitter…they’ve been gone for a whole week. I hope we don’t have any major melt downs!

Here are some pictures from the weekend!