Friday, April 27, 2007

Being A Mom

Being a mom is the greatest position I’ve ever held. It beats being any position in the workforce by a long shot. Of course this seems weird, because being a mom pays you squat and positions in the workforce can pay you up to lots and lots of dollars. So it’s funny when I think that the rewards of hugs and kisses, and laughs, and baby-talk, and trying so hard to be like mommy, and secrets, and “I love you’s,” and snuggling, and hearing “dat funny” from my son, and hearing “well yeahhh” from my daughter, and doing my daughter’s hair, and watching her put on make-up, and sitting on the floor with my daughter in my lap with my arms around her just rocking, and my son repeating every word I say as he learns to talk would be worth so much more than any amount of money?

We had dinner with some friends last night and she told me how someone was absolutely shocked that she had three kids and wanted another one. She told them she loved being with her kids…she loved them so much. We have fun with our kids. If you ask my husband and I which we’d rather have, a day to ourselves or a day with the kids, we’d pick the day with our kids in a heartbeat. My poor parents are always trying to take the kids for the weekend or a week – partly to give us a break but mostly because they just want to spend time with them. We have a really hard time letting them go, even for a couple of days. My kids are down with them right now…hubby and I will be there tonight, and just the couple of hours last night that they should have been there and weren’t were hard for us.

Too many people have kids that shouldn’t. And I’m not talking about the “accidents” and the crack-addicts on the street corner. I’m talking about middle to upper class suburbanites that have kids because “it’s the thing to do,” they’re on to that phase of their life. If you don’t want kids, don’t have them. Plain and simple. Why do people have kids if they don’t enjoy being with them? Again, I’m talking about the people that deliberately have kids, but you see them doing their own thing while their kids play. Every.single.time. And I know that we need breaks…I completely get that…even week-long breaks every once in a while. But even those breaks are hard for us…we have to make ourselves take them for our sanity because after being away from the kids for an hour I’m ready to turn right back around and stay with them!

And you’re right, I don’t know for sure that all of these kids weren’t accidents. But considering I’m talking about a group of well-educated folks with 2 or more kids, I’m guessing that they weren’t accidents.

I’m sure I’m opening up a can of worms (which I love to do) but seriously…I don’t like dogs, so I would never go out and get a dog just because most families have dogs these days. So why on earth are people doing that with kids? It’s just so nice to be around and be friends with people that think the same way we do about our kids…we love them more than anything in the world and we will spend every free second with them that we can!

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

It always interesting to me to come back and read comments left on posts like this of your's.

I agree with you--don't have children if you don't WANT them. While Morgan wasn't 100% planned AT THE TIME, I knew I WANTED a child. Yes, I want that break and look forward to a few hours "off", but I'm always excited to get back home and scoop her up to play.

I hope you guys enjoyed your small break...as hard as it was, it's also good for you AND the kids :)

Michele_3 said...

I always say that being a mom is one of the most hardest & enjoyable times in my life.
I have some challenging moments raising 3 boys, somedays I want to pull my hair out even! But I wouldn't trade it for anything else in the world. I have learned so much from my kids- It is amazing on how children can transform your life in many ways..

We know a couple who had a child just because everyone they knew were too, He is an only child & spends a lot of time at daycares,camps & sitters while the parents still carry on their lives as if they never had a child- It is really very sad to me..

Good Post!

Radioactive Tori said...

I totally understand. My husband's parents always want to give me a "break" from my kids and I don't like to let them go. I feel like part of me is missing when they are away.

I have a friend who told me that she only had a baby because it was the thing people do after they get married. I don't judge her for it, but she does need lots of extra support. Luckily when she needs help, I am there to help her. Kids are stressful, and some people just aren't equipped to handle it all the time. Hopefully they have friends that can help them when they need help.

Jennifer (Jen on the Edge) said...

Even though our girls are 6 and 8, we still have a hard time for us to leave them with other people. It's not that we don't trust others, it's just that we like doing stuff with our children. We do go out for lunch dates while the girls are at school, but our date nights number only about 4-6 year, and it's rare for the girls to spend a night away from us and then it's only one.

Bethany said...

I miss Ebaby when I am at work. I can't wait to get back to her.

We went to a wedding in Sept and my parents watched her. My mom said it was ok to just let her sleep over since we would be getting home so late. Well I just couldn't do it! We picked her up just after midnight. I'm just not ready for her to sleep some place else. Not even my parent's house!

Amy W said...

One of my best friends had a daughter and really, really shouldn't have. She enjoys her time too much. It's hard to see that.

Kelly said...

I'm with you on this. There are people who are too quick to get rid of their children or pass them off every chance they get. The saddest thing...who does it affect?? The children!! They grow up with a false sense of family!

Although I don't have any kids as of yet, I do know that if an "accident" were to happen you can bet I would love and welcome and cherish the child into my life!!

Hell I love kids and can't wait to have them!! Like you said, I think it is life's biggest reward!!!

Jill said...
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