Happy, Sad, Confused, Relieved, Scared...Plus a Million Other Emotions I'm Feeling

We filed our 10-K yesterday. It feels so good to have that done! This year went so much smoother than last year, which I would like to attribute to me being better at my job (since last year I had just been thrown into my position and kudos to my boss for putting up with my lack of knowledge and experience!), but who knows. I do know that I had virtually no over-time and very little weekend work the past two months, which is just amazing!

On the flip side of that we had to let our nanny go on Monday. It was one of the hardest days I’ve had in a long time. The previous Saturday Kylie had told me that when they were at McDonald’s, Ryan had fallen out of his carrier, onto the floor. I was caught off-guard and John and I kept going over the whole scenario with her again and again. I contacted the nanny and her response was “Ryan woke up and startled himself and started crying.” Kylie and Josh both said that they saw him on the ground, on his belly. The nanny informed me that she had laid him on the ground to un-swaddle him. I just had such an uneasy feeling the whole weekend.

John and I talked and talked…it was hard because she was so good with the kids! We had some minor issues with her, but we were working through them. But it all kept coming back to judgment. She acknowledged that Ryan was not buckled into his carrier when she was swinging him, and that’s why he got startled. There have also been other judgment issues – Kylie told us that the nanny asked if Kylie could flat iron her own hair one day (my flat iron gets up to 425 degrees) and my fantastic little girl informed her that she’s not allowed to touch my flat iron! But the kids loved her, and she played with them all day, and Ryan really loved snuggling with her.

But Sunday night John and I agreed that we could not worry about the safety of our children, no matter how good she was with the kids. And while we weren’t 100% sure it happened the way Kylie said it did, too many things seemed off and Kylie has no reason to make up a story like that. So we agreed that we would let her know Monday night that we were done, and that whole day I was sick to my stomach.

I mean, my head knew that’s what we had to do. But I have such compassion for this girl, and I knew how much she truly loved the kids, and how hard this was going to be for her (she had cried on the phone when I confronted her about the whole situation on Saturday).

On Monday Kylie called me crying saying that the nanny told her to call me and tell me that she was lying. That she didn’t actually see Ryan fall. I told her and the nanny that they should not be talking about this and that she shouldn’t bring it up again. I guess at one point Kylie went downstairs and found her laying on the floor crying. Kylie asked her what was wrong and she said “I just can’t do anything right.” Later Monday night we learned from Josh that when he was upstairs laying down for his nap her heard Kylie and the nanny talking about it (which was after I specifically told her to stop).

So after work we talked to her. And she cried, but went on her way. And then I cried. A lot. We asked Kylie and Josh again what happened, and realized by this point, with listening to the nanny all day, she didn’t remember what happened…she kept saying “the nanny said he didn’t fall…” But Josh told us that he saw Kylie crying when it happened, and we asked her why she was crying, and she told us that she was worried about Ryan. The nanny said that Kylie “assumed the worst when she heard Ryan crying,” but I’ve never had Kylie come up to me crying when she hears Ryan crying…she just assumes he’s hungry!

Here I go again…trying to convince myself that we did the right thing…which we did….right? I’m just surprised at how many people aren’t shocked when I tell them that Ryan fell out of the carrier. I see more sympathy towards having to let the nanny go than compassion about us having to worry about his safety. These encounters are not helping me feel better about our decision. Am I crazy???

Right now we have our first babysitter watching the kids. She’s the one that started watching Kylie when she was 8 months and had Joshie since he was born. She lives ½ hour away, and while we tried taking the kids there for 6 months after we moved, we just couldn’t keep doing it (she lives ½ hour in the opposite direction of work and home). She comes to our house and has picked up where she left off…the kids know they have rules to follow and I feel so comfortable when I’m at work knowing that they are safe and loved. So that has been a huge relief! I’m trying to hard to convince her that this would be a great job for her and she should take it permanently!

So that’s what has been going on with us. We are now interviewing nannies again and just trying to spend as much time together as a family as possible!

Valentine's Day

What a great Valentine's Day weekend (a little late :) )!

Friday John and I went to Kylie's class party. Her class put on a play and Kylie had the lead! She was the only one that had lines that only she said (the rest of the class was broken into groups and said their lines together). These were her lines:

I'm a lost little Valentine

I'm a sad little Valentine

And I'll tell you why

I must find a home or else I'll cry

Knock, Knock, Knock, is this the home where I belong?

She was so cute!

Friday night John and I went to dinner at Hyde Park. It was a fantastic meal! The only downside was the John had the hiccups :( and when he gets them, he gets them bad! We were there for 2 hours and we got to talk, which was so nice!

My mom called me on the way home saying that Ryan was screaming and she had tried everything. I know it's bad if my mom calls me because she can calm any baby down! So we rushed home and of course, the minute I take him in my arms he's fine. He's such a momma's boy and while it's annoying at times, I really do love him so much, so I can usually tolerate it well.

Friday night Kylie and Josh got to go to Aunt Mimi's for a sleepover! They played games, ate pizza and watched a movie. They said they had so much fun!

Saturday the kids went to a party in the morning, and then we met them at Lowe's for the kids project. After that we went over to the mall so the kids could play in the play area. After that it was home for naps!

Sunday was church and relaxing! It really was a nice weekend!

Valentine's Day Plans

John thinks he's funny :)

We have decided to celebrate Valentine's day on Friday, for a couple of reasons. One of those reasons being that we had not made any plans as of last weekend, and the chances of us getting a reservation anywhere were pretty slim.

The other reason we decided to celebrate it tomorrow night is because Kylie and Josh will be spending the night at my sister-in-law's house (she's hosting a nice big cousin sleepover), so we only needed to find someone to watch Ryan (thanks mom!).

So John was in charge of making reservations. he sends me this e-mail:

Much better. Dinner, Friday night, 7:00PM… http://www.kgtechnology.com/dinner.html

-Hubby-

Go there. Now.

Funny guy, isn't he?

So I play along and tell him I'm so excited that he's taking me to Hawaii, and that I'm leaving work now to go and pack. Then he comes back with "Bobby (CEO of my company) texted me and said you're not allowed to leave...too much work to do...sorry"

When I got home that night he did tell me that we had reservations at Hyde Park, which I'm so excited about because I hear about it all the time but have never been there.

A Fun-Filled Weekend!

What a fantastically crazy busy weekend!

It was my sister’s birthday, so Friday night, she, my mom, Kylie, Ryan and then my other sister went to dinner together (nice girls’ night plus Ry-Ry :) ).

Saturday we got up and went to the gym and then ran to the store. I made the cheesecake for my sister because she doesn’t like normal icing (it was Paula Dean’s recipe and it was the best cheesecake ever!). Then we headed to Buca Di Beppo for dinner. It was so much fun and the food was fantastic!

The fam at dinner

After dinner we headed to the Columbus Blue Jackets game. Joshie is REALLY into hockey, so it was so much fun to watch his face during the game. And his favorite player, Rick Nash, scored one of the three goals, and the Blue Jackets won in OT! Both Kylie and Josh did great during the game, and even Ryan did pretty well (I think it’s funny that he’s 4 ½ months and has been to 2 NHL games already). After the game we came home and ate some great cheesecake and my sister opened her presents.

Ry-Ry enjoying his second hockey game

Blue Jackets Game for Cindy's Birthday from Debbie on Vimeo.

Sunday we went to church where John and I completely lost control of the Sunday school kids :) Not really, but we had a lot of criers, so it was a difficult morning. After church we headed to hockey fest. The Blue Jackets put on this whole event to raise money for their charity. My sister’s boyfriend works for the Blue Jackets, so a big thank you to him for the tickets! We also got to see him a few times while he was working, which was nice. I also really appreciated my mom and sister for watching Ryan so that I didn’t have to worry about him and a stroller while we were there!

Kylie, Big Josh (my sister's boyfriend) and Little Josh

The kids went down and first got their picture taken with a real hockey player. Then they went and took shots at the goalie (who was fantastic! He kept pushing the pucks in when little guys like Joshie didn’t hit them hard enough).

The kids with a real hockey player!

Trying to make goals

Making Goals! from Debbie on Vimeo.

After we spent too much money on the real hockey stuff, we went up to enjoy the free things like the bouncy house and slide and a friendly game of street hockey. The kids had a blast!

Playing Hockey at Hockey Fest from Debbie on Vimeo.

We then went home and took naps, said good-bye to the fam as they headed out, and just tried to rest up for this upcoming week. It really was a great weekend!

Last night I put Ryan in his crib so that I could finish putting away some clothes. I put him on his belly and then put some mirrors in front of him. Kylie was playing with him for a while, and then I had her help me put away her clothes. When she went back, he was on his back! I was shocked, because it usually takes so much longer for kids to roll from their back to their belly since they’re not used to being on their belly. And he hasn’t really rolled much from his back to his belly – he’s happy just being a fat log :) So I turned him back over and sure enough, he rolled again!

Here is Kylie video taping him. He didn’t roll again, but at least you can see some cute smiles :)


Kylie Taping Ryan from Debbie on Vimeo.

And when I got home from work yesterday, this is how I found Josh:

I asked him if he was a girl and he said “yes.” Kylie thought it was funny to get him all dressed up, put lotion and perfume on him, and even put sparkles on him! This is my football loving, hockey playing, always getting in trouble because he’s starting fights with boys everywhere little boy! John actually got home before me, and I couldn’t figure out why he was so calm (those of you that know him know that he is not into Joshie pretending to be a girl…to put it lightly). He then told me that he was going to take a picture and show it to him on his first date.

What am I going to do with this little boy?

New Gadget For Kids...

This morning on two different news shows, I saw the story about how Leap Frog has come out with this new toy that looks just like a smart phone. On each of the shows the people were talking about how bad it was going to be to let your child get addicted to a "phone" so early...and what kind of an example are we?

Give me a freaking break!

Toy manufacturers have made kid-friendly remotes, keys, purses, tools...you name it. Why? Because kids want to be just like mommy and daddy and want to play with things that have buttons and make noise. And I don't know about you, but John and I are attached to our phones (and while I don't have a Blackberry, I do have a Palm Treo so it's very similar-looking). Our kids watch movies on our phones and play games...so why the heck would I not want them to have one of their own so they will leave mine alone?

Technology is moving forward at light speed...and our kids are naturally going to be at the front of it, if not ahead of it.

And just for the record, I LOVE Leap Frog products! Their refrigerator letters and their videos taught both of my kids their letters, and their new Tag reading system is awesome!

So I say more power to them! And you had better believe that when this comes out this summer, at least two of my three kids will have it!

New Year's Eve...

I never posted about our New Year’s Eve :) I’m over a month late…so what?

We decided to have some friends over for New Year’s Eve. We had two families from church, my parents, and our great friends that moved to New York were coming in town for the weekend!

We started around 7:00 with a ton of food. I had the chocolate fountain going and some other items and each family brought something too. We had the Wii set up in one room and the projector on the family room wall for the big ball drop. We had a total of 7 kids playing down in the playroom and basement, and they were all so good the whole night!

Our friends that moved came in around 10:30…it was so good to see them! We hadn’t seen Jose in months! The girls came in and went downstairs to play with the other kids. Kylie was so excited to see Carly! We now had 9 kids playing ranging in ages from 1 to 11.

A little before midnight I started pouring everyone’s champagne and sparkling juice for the kiddos. We all watched the ball drop and there were “cheers” all around. We actually had to rewind the ball dropping a bunch of times for Josh…he wanted to see it over and over again!

It was nice afterwards because people didn’t rush out of there…they hung around until about 1:30. John and I then cleaned up and went to bed :)

Here’s a picture of the kiddos…the poor little girl on the right was so tired, so mom had to hold her head up for the picture…she was not happy!



It was one of the most fun New Year’s Eves I’ve had in a while!

The rest of the weekend we got to hang out with our friends that moved. Their house hasn't sold, so they slept there, but there's nothing in it, so them, us and another set of neighbors all rotated houses and activities. We had dinner together every night, the kids went ice skating, and Kylie was introduced to Perler Beads :) We had so much fun with them and it was hard yet again for them to leave on Sunday. Luckily they'll be coming back for another visit this month!

It's Friday!!

TGIF!!!

This week has flown by! And I'm so glad it's Friday!

Tonight we have a fundraiser dinner at Kylie's school and she will be singing. My mom, dad and sister will be coming which will be nice.

Tomorrow, John and my dad are taking the kids to the power show. This is an annual tradition for them...there are all kinds of big trucks for the kids to climb on and look at. My mom, Ryan and I will be hanging out at home :)

I really hope to relax and get some stuff done around the house this weekend. So far work is going really well so hopefully I won't have to do any of that :) I just want to snuggle up on the couch with Ry-Ry and watch TV :)

Nothing else is really going on...we're dealing with some serious attitude problems from Kylie towards our nanny. I know she's just testing her, but it's still so very frustrating to come home every day and hear how mean Kylie was. I feel like all I'm doing is punishing her! I know we will get through this...I just hope it's soon :)

Misc. Stuff...

-It took me 1 1/2 hours to get to work today (it normally takes me 1/2 hour). People have no idea how to drive in the snow!

-We're supposed to get a ton more snow today and tonight...I will be taking my work home with me just in case :)

-I'm on a serious work-out/weight-loss kick. I'm doing so well with my eating and going to the gym. I was pleasantly surprised last night when I weighed myself that I weigh 6 lbs. less than I thought I did...so I only have 14 lbs. to lose instead of 20!

-I would like to lose a lot of that before our trip to Florida in two months.

-We'll see how good I can keep being :)

-Ryan is still sleeping in my bed with me. I hate it! But he is so freaking adorable... :)

-Kylie and Josh are great...I'm trying so hard to balance my time with them!

-Work is busy...better get back to it :)

Ryan Update...

Ryan turned 4 months on January 20th. Here are the results from his well-check:


Weight: 15 lbs. 13 oz (75%) (Holy Moly!)
Length: 25 1/2 inches long (75%)


We're going to start him on cereal this weekend...I can't believe he's ready for solid foods already!


He is smiling so much now! He has also started laughing a little when he's super happy. He reaches his hands (still very awkwardly) to grab at stuff, and everything goes in his mouth!


If you kiss anywhere near his mouth he tries to eat you...I love it!


He is constantly eating his hands. I'm starting to think he likes the sensation on his fingers because when I put my fingers in his mouth, he bites for a second and then pushes them out, whereas the other kids would chomp away on my fingers too.


He has not rolled over again since the first time a month ago. I think he's too fat :) I think his thighs are bigger than Kylie's :) But he is the cutest thing!

He "talks" all the time. But it's hard to understand him because his hands are in his mouth when he's talking to us :)

He's still not sleeping well. He wants someone to hold him when he sleeps, including at night, so I usually only get a few hours of sleep without having to hold him. He is still getting up once at night to eat (and we can all see he does not need that food!).


He still has the biggest, most beautiful blue eyes. We can thank Grandma Stickel for those...she gave them to kylie and it looks like maybe ryan will be keeping his (she's the only one on both sides that has blue eyes).


He is such a wonderful little guy*!



*and by "little," I mean big and fat :)

Boobie-Feeding

I am nursing Ryan. I nursed the other kids as well…I do it for one year and then I give them the boot :) I do it because 1.) it helps me lose weight faster; 2.) it is so much cheaper than formula; 3.) it’s so nice and convenient…I can’t even imagine having to make a bottle in the middle of the night! and 4.) there is a huge nutritional value for the baby. I don’t really get the whole “bonding” thing…I’ve given my kids bottles and I bond with them just as much then as when my boob is in their mouth (and I don’t feel quite so violated which is nice). And yes, at times there is a nice feeling when the baby cries until I hold it and feed it and it really only wants me, but honestly, that’s annoying more times than warm and fuzzy. I have really enjoyed though the “excuse” of having to feed Ryan…sometimes it’s nice to lock myself in my room and watch TV and get away from everyone!

However, I am not the typical “pro-breastfeeding” type of girl. I hate breastfeeding in public (although with my third I’m a lot more apt to do it than I was with Ky or Josh)…I usually go out to the car and feed Ryan if he needs to eat. It also makes me uncomfortable to see other moms nursing…why? I have no idea! I also have no problem giving my kids formula and we stuck bottles and pacifiers in their mouths as soon as they were born. I don’t like feeling trapped…it’s too hard for John and I to go away for a weekend because I’d have to pump every so many hours which is just annoying! And my body is not my own…I go 9 months watching everything that goes into my mouth, and while it’s not even close to as bad (I drink alcohol and am able to take drugs again if I’m sick), it’s still not the same.

And the biggest way I’m not the typical “pro-breastfeeding” girl? I DON’T LOVE DOING IT!!!

Some of that may have to do with the whole pumping-thing. Yes, I pump at work…always have. I’m very lucky in that my body has no problem providing more than enough food for my little babies (my in-laws often joke about how full our freezer always was and gave me a sticker that says “got milk?”). But to take time out of my day (usually 2 or 3 times per day) to sit and pump just sucks!

But I realized I’m not hating it as much this time…and you know why? In the past I’ve always had to load up my stuff and head off to a conference room (at my old job it had a glass door so I had to tape paper all over it to cover it up) and sit there for 10 minutes doing my thing. But now? I have an office! All I have to do is close the door and go to work! I can browse the internet for a few minutes and the time goes by so quickly!

It still doesn’t change how I feel about the whole thing, but at least I’m lucky enough to be able to not have to leave my office anymore to pump! And in the end, I really do it because I believe it’s the best decision for my babies and myself (even if I do complain about it)**. And if anyone out there ever needs advice or has any questions, I do consider myself an expert now :)


**I have absolutely nothing against bottle-fed babies - the decision has to be what's best for each baby and mother/father

Misc. Stuff...

Life is definitely getting busy! This past weekend we were able to relax a little…I had to work some but other than that we didn’t have too much going on.

Last night we had some friends over to discuss Sunday school planning – John and I are in charge of Journey Kidz, which is the group of kids 18 months – 4 years. Our friends are in charge of the babies, so we’re trying to work together to get scheduling done and just try to figure everything out (we were all just put in charge of this). The kids all had a blast playing together and it was nice to do something that made me completely forget about work.

Work is starting to get really busy…I like that my days go by fast, but I’m about to get to a point where I’ll be leaving work just to go home and work some more, which I will hate.

That’s about it…oh, and I’m on Facebook now…so if any of you want to be friends, look me up or let me know!

Christmas 2008

Finally my Christmas Post :)

We worked really hard this year to try to have everything done the weekend before Christmas, and we were really, really close. This made that week of Christmas very nice and relaxing! My mom was in town, and then my sister came in from Michigan Tuesday night. Unfortunately we got a very big ice storm that evening so it took her forever to get here, but thankfully she arrived safe and sound.

The Friday before Christmas Kylie had her class party, which I got to go to:

Christmas Eve my mom, sister, Kylie and I headed out to do a few last-minute errands (I had to mail my Christmas cards, grocery shop, and my mom had to pick up a present). When we got home I started to work on our Christmas Eve dinner (prime rib, green beans and mashed potatoes).

Our church did not have a Christmas Eve service, and since we go to church all the time, we didn’t feel it necessary to attend some other church just to go. So that took a lot of time pressure off of us this year! My mom, sisters, dad and Kylie all went to a service, so we were able to finish wrapping some presents and get dinner finished up.

Dinner was awesome! I mean really, how can you go wrong with prime rib? After dinner we relaxed a little bit and then the kids opened presents. They got to open their PJs from us, and their presents from my sisters. Then they put out the cookies and milk for Santa and headed up to bed.

Once the kids were in bed we made some adult hot chocolate and my sisters and I all exchanged presents. It was so nice and relaxing! Both of my sisters spent the night and my parents were in their house next door.

Christmas morning we woke up around 7:30. The kids actually didn’t wake up until around 8:00. Kylie was so excited about everything she had gotten in her stocking. My sister put the sticky buns in the oven and we started into the presents! Joshie got his long anticipated gumball machine and Kylie got her “I Gotta Go Doll.”

My sister with Ryan:

After presents we ate a great brunch and just hung out for a little bit. Around 3:30 we headed over to John’s sister’s house for his family Christmas. We had a great dinner and watched a great family slide show that his sister prepares every year. Then it was present time!

I don't have any pictures of Kylie and Josh at John's sister's house...when we go to cousin Carson's house, we never see the kids...they are always off playing!

We got home pretty late and everyone headed to bed. My sister was able to stay with us until Sunday, so we spent the next couple days cooking with all my new toys (a new fryer, knives, WOK, and lots of other cool gadgets) and just hanging out. The time went by way too quickly!

Joshie and Daddy shaving with Joshie's new shaving kit:

Our Christmas card picture:

Misc. Stuff...

What a busy week for us! Monday night we had a meeting about childcare at our church, then last night we had house church, tonight Kylie has gymnastics and then we desperately want to go to the gym, and then tomorrow night I have my moms' group. No one is getting enough sleep with all of this craziness. Hopefully this weekend I'll get to rest up.

Work is starting to get really busy...I'm really hoping that it's not as bad as last year. The one advantage I have this year is that I'm not pregnant!

Ryan is doing a little better with the whole sleep thing. He got sick about a month ago, and before that he was sleeping through the night in his little bed next to mine. Once he got sick, all he wanted to do was sleep in my arms. And even now that he's better, that's where he wants to be. Last night I was able to put him in his bed (sound asleep of course), and then he woke up at 2:30 AM to eat (in his defense he hadn't eaten since 5:30 the night before, so he went 9 hours), slept in my arms for an hour or two, and then I put him back in his bed. I just want to get back to the way it was!

Our nanny is fantastic! I she texts me throughout the day with little updates about how things are going. She is so great with the kids and they really like her, which makes going to work so much easier!

OK, off to work...I just want it to be Friday :)

Kylie's First Sleepover

On Friday night Kylie had her first real sleepover (the first one that started with her playing with a friend and ended with her playing with a friend...she had attempted to spend the night at someone's house another time but came back home around 11:30).

Her little friend Isabella called all week and she and Kylie were trying to arrange a playdate. Friday when I got home from work I told Ky to call her and set something up for the evening. Somehow Kylie started talking about a sleepover. I really didn't care...I didn't have anything going on and I figured that this would keep her occupied and I could guilt-free get some make-up cuddling time with Ryan. So I talked to Isabella's mom and we got the whole thing set up.

The girls played wonderfully together! And for a good part of the night they actually included Josh too, which was really nice. They ended the evening watching a movie, eating popcorn and cookies and then off to bed around 10:45.

I woke up to them giggling around 8:00. Hubby got up with them and let me have a little more sleep. We all ate breakfast and then her mom came and picked her up.

I have to admit I'm glad that her first sleepover was at our house...it's going to be a lot harder for me to let her go to other people's houses (but I know I will have to).

The only bad thing was that Isabella's mom called us Saturday night and told us that Isabella had the stomach flu. Of course she played with everyone, including Ryan, and slept in Kylie's bed. I'm praying very hard that none of us get it!

A Conversation About Where Ryan Came From...

Last night in the car John and I were listening in on the most adorable conversation between Kylie and Josh:

Kylie: "Mommy and Daddy took me on a special date to Red Lobster one time"
Josh: "I want to go"
Kylie: "No Joshie, you stayed home with Pappaw when we went"
Josh: "Was Ryan in mommy's tummy?"
Kylie: "No, this was when Ryan was up in Heaven with God"
Josh: "Huh?"
Kylie: "Ryan was up in Heaven with God before he was in mommy's belly"
Josh: "Did God hold Ryan?"
Kylie: "No, he was just...there"
Josh: "Huh?"
Kylie: "Ryan was up in Heaven with God and then God said 'I think mommy needs another
baby' so he threw Ryan into mommy's belly"
Josh: "Did it hurt Ryan when God threw him?"
Kylie: "Well He didn't throw Him...he used His magic and put Ryan in mommy's belly"
Josh: "Huh?"
Kylie: "God has magic. And He used His magic when he decided that mommy needed another
baby...He put Ryan in mommy's belly"
Josh: "Oooohhhh, I'm going to ask Santa for wings!!!"

I couldn't make that conversation up if I wanted to!

Payback - 20 years later...

When I was little I would often come up with these "great" ideas involving me going to someone's house or them coming over to my house to play. And since these ideas were so "great," I felt the need to bombard my mother with them as soon as they popped into my head. But she would always squish them and tell me that I can't tackle her with my ideas as soon as she walks in the door, or as soon as she wakes up, or as soon as she finishes doing something, etc.

I hated that. I wanted to play at someone's house and that couldn't wait for her to get dressed, or take her coat off or whatever she was doing!

Last night I experienced the frustration that my mom felt so many times with me :) I walked in the door from work and Kylie is standing in the laundry room talking on the phone. I had not even closed the door yet and she tells me "Isabella wants me to come over for a playdate...can you talk to her?"

Now my first reaction was to scold her and tell her that I just got home, I hadn't taken my coat off yet and I needed to go see the other kids and talk to the nanny. But I remembered how I felt when I was little, so I tried to find a compromise...I told her to keep talking while I put my stuff down and said "hello" to everyone, and then I would talk to her. I was also surprised because Kylie has never talked on the phone to anyone other than family before, so it was a shock to see her on the phone with one of her friends from school.

It turns out 5 year-old phone understanding is non-existent because the rest of the night was spent playing phone tag because one girl would hang up on the other one or messages weren't taken properly, so no play date was ever scheduled.

But I have to admit it was very cute to see her all grown up, talking on the phone, and so excited about playing with one of her friends.

Yesterday was OK. I did have to leave work to take Ry to the doctor - he's had a horrible cough for 2 weeks now. Turns out he has bronchiolitis (which is viral) and an ear infection. Thankfully he's still smiling and laughing and eating, so it's not too bad.

The kids loved the nanny yesterday. I loved her as well as I walked in to find my laundry done! That is not part of her job description and yet it was done. She says she loves doing laundry. She can love it and do it all she wants because I hate it!

Tonight I have dinner with the girls at PF Changs. I love that place and I love dinner with the girls, so it should be a fun time.

I hope to post about our Christmas soon...I need to get the pictures on to my computer.

Back For Good...

I'm back at work today. With no hopes of any time off for a couple months. This time is a lot harder than the other times...little Ry-Ry really has a firm grip on my heart and my heart is hurting right now. I can't figure out what it is about this little guy that has captivated me so much more than the other two did.

It is also so hard not being able to play with the kids...to talk to them while they eat breakfast, to read to them, to watch TV with them. But on the flip side, it's also nice not having to figure out when I'm going to get something to eat, or how I'm going to take a shower if Ry-Ry is fussy.

I miss daytime TV :)

Thankfully I have found a fantastic nanny. She has already texted me a few times about how the kids are doing and it's only 9:15 AM!

I know that I will get through this...I know that after a few days or weeks I will be back to normal and it won't hurt so much to go to work.

I miss my kids :(

Rolling Right Along

Today this cute little boy hit a milestone.

He rolled over.

He's been rolling onto his side for about two weeks now, but tonight, as Kylie, Josh and I were wrapping presents, he decided that he was bored with looking up at the cute little things hanging down from his play mat and rolled himself over to see what was on the bottom. The kids and I immediately started cheering for him and he quickly got a weird look on his face like "what the heck are you making so much noise for?"

Kylie and Josh both rolled over between 4 and 5 months. Ryan is not even 3 months yet...maybe he'll be our little one that is early with the motor skills. Think we're in trouble?

On another note, Ryan was wearing a 6 - 9 month Christmas outfit today that Josh wore for Christmas. However, Josh was born a full 3 months earlier in the year than Ryan.

Do you think he eats a lot?